Nando. So, I’m seeing another woman.
Corrina. What? Wait, what about Lara?
Nando. What about her? I’m seeing another woman.
Corrina. I’m sorry, I don’t know if I can endorse this. Does Lara know about this?
Nando. No, why should I tell her?
Corrina. Well, why are you telling me?
Nando. I trust you, and I have no problems revealing my shortcomings to you.
Corrina. I think I’m getting nauseous.
Nando. Come on. This can’t be surprising. It’s me.
Corrina. Yes, I’m sorry, I’m putting general decency into your personality. So, what’s her name?
Nando. Ebba. I don’t know what it is. I meet her, right? And all I want to do is buy her things. I’m getting her stuffed bears, books, potted plants, I’m making her deserts. Get this, I go by a garage sale, and see this lamp, and I’m like I have to get this for her.
Corrina. A lamp? Sounds like love.
Nando. Nah, I thought about it in the shower, and I’ve just figured that I just want to buy her things to make her happy, you know?
Corrina. Well, why don’t you buy me things?
Nando. I’ve thought about that too, and I figured out this. Buying you things won’t make you happy. You’d just laugh at a lamp.
Corrina. You’re right, I would.
Nando. So, I don’t know what’ll make you happy. I just talk to you, you know?
Corrina. That’s actually sweet. In a strange way.
Nando. Oh yeah?
Corrina. Can you stop touching me?
End. Lamps vs. Conversation